Born from the ashes of every trunk-or-treat, patriotic worship night, and women’s ministry that dared wear jeans, dontperish.org was created as a loving, biblically inaccurate response to the weaponized street shouting of self-ordained prophets with bullhorns and zero friends.
Our founder, who received no dreams, visions, or angelic endorsements (and is okay with that), launched this site to help others heal from second-degree holiness burns and excessive exposure to Leviticus-wielding lone wolves.
Yes. But also no. But mostly yes. But seriously, we’re here to use satire to defend grace, Scripture, and community against spiritual absolutism and sandal-based righteousness.
We categorically reject the following:
Want to stand against graceless street rage? Tired of being told your church is apostate because your pastor uses PowerPoint? Join us in standing for:
If you’re ready to test everything — especially theological grumpiness — then welcome home. You may still perish (eventually), but at least not from hyper-legalism.
dontperish.org — For the remnant who didn’t make it into the remnant of the remnant.